Is stalking a valid form of romance?

Swathi, a 24-year old Infosys employee was murdered on June 24, 2016 at the Nungambakkam railway station in Chennai allegedly by a stalker whom she refused. This gave birth to several discussions about the portrayal of stalking in films, romanticizing stalking in films, the effect of these on society, how and why stalking is not a valid form of romance and so on. There were even petitions asking directors and actors to stop this. Personally, I find the portrayal of stalking as a form of romance and its overuse distasteful. But, I was uncomfortable signing the petition, as I felt that would be exploiting the emotion to bring forward a change we always wanted. However, urged by a relative of mine I finally signed the petition.

After a few days I happened to watch a Korean serial named "Boys over flowers". It is based on a Manga (Japanese comic) "hana yori dango". It is written by a woman for women - a shojo (teenage girls) manga. The story is about a poor girl getting scholarship to go study in a rich elite school due to some turn of events. The school is ruled by 4 ``Princes". The story is an extreme female fantasy in which two of these princes fall in love with this girl. One among them does much more than plain stalking. And this series seems really popular among girls. I was totally confused.

Later when I discussed this with another relative, she told me that stalking is a common trope in the west as well. And a simple google search proved her right. Apparently, the hero in Twilight, a vampire who does not sleep, watches the heroine sleep all night before he ever confessed his love. And Twilight is extremely popular among girls, who don't seem to have a problem with this stalking or even find it enviable.

Now, knowing all this, I find it hard to believe that stalking is not a valid form of romance. The popularity across cultures suggests that, there are people who like to stalk and people who like to be stalked. If you think that is not true, you have to come up with pretty strong counter arguments. I am waiting.

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Kettiyollaanu Ente Maalakha

Kettiyollaanu Ente Maalakha is the story of Sleevachan (Asif Ali), a good-natured individual ignorant of the ways of romance and sex. Although he had avoided marriage until 35, he decides to marry to care for his ageing mother. The rest of the movie is about his struggles in the journey forward. I would like to get a bit into the story as some of it begs discussion. Thus, there will be some spoilers, but I believe they would not really spoil anything. Soon after fixing the marriage, he starts panicking. He even confesses to the local priest that he is feeling stressed because of his ignorance. However, the priest casually dismisses these worries. After marrying Rincy, he is unable to initiate a physical relationship, causing even more stress. Sleevachan's struggles were cracking up people all around me, and I felt, perhaps that was the director's intention. Those very same scenes were, however, making me extremely uncomfortable....

Helen

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The Good Place

The good place is a great entertainer - especially the first season. The climax of the first season was the highest point for me. Things did start going downhill (in my personal opinion) but the show managed to keep me hooked till the end. I certainly wanted to know how the show ends. However, I have some beef with the basic premise of the show - it is either flawed or they took the easy route. To discuss these issues, I will, unfortunately, have to divulge the intricate details of the show. So, needless to say, this post is full of spoilers . So, if you plan to watch the show, it would be better if you read this article after you finish watching the show. Else, the article might give a neat summary of the interesting ideas in the show. The basic premise of the show is that the criteria for deciding who goes to the good place are flawed. The main justification for the claim comes from two observations: For the last 500 years, no one has been to the good place (think heaven...

2d-life;

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